Katie's Thoughts On Sex

I’m going to write in my blog about sex; my views, specifically. I can do this because my mother does not know of this blog, thank goodness. 

I enjoy sex, and I have had sex often enough too, but I don’t consider myself even remotely promiscuous. I am 27 years old and I have had sexual relations with six different guys. Six. I have lost track of all but three of them, but I recall the names of each. There have been no one night stands.  

To me, sex is a part of an adult relationship. It falls in line in a specific order as a relationship matures. For me, a relationship begins with simply liking the guy. I feel a kind of chemistry with him. I enjoy being with him. We think a lot alike. Those feelings are like fertile soil, primed for me to feel an affection for the person, hopefully an affection we both will feel. The affection might not become a reality, but at least the conditions are right. If the guy seems to want to take the next step, generally speaking, I am willing too.

So we go out socially, this guy and me. The date confirms my feelings -assuming that it does confirm them- and hopefully this new emotion comes into play. The emotion is a closeness, a warmth. For me, I want to express this feeling I have. That is my personal preference; to express this nice emotion. I do so with a kiss. The kiss might be accompanied with the kind of hug that projects affection rather than friendliness.

If all is still going well and the proverbial boat is still afloat the next time we go out, I am looking to confirm all the feelings and thoughts I have felt to that point. I am not necessarily aware that I am looking to confirm. It is pretty much done subconsciously. But at the risk of sounding needlessly romantic, my heart knows. At that point I am ready to take the next step and make the relationship a physical one.

I have known many men in my life and as I have already said, I have had intimate relations with six of them. None of them were amazing men. Most of them were not particularly handsome nor had impressive professional resumes. Those things do not mean a lot to me. But they were men who were smart, funny, thoughtful, and with each I felt a genuine affection and a rare emotional connection.

I have climaxed with only one man in my life, but I climaxed with him most of the time. It was just a matter of his being ceaselessly unselfish, knowing what I liked, and finally, my being relaxed with him. But even without reaching “the end of the rainbow”, I enjoy intimate relations because I take pleasure in the nearness; our arms wrapped around each other in tenderness, and the kisses. I like the quiet moments immediately afterwards too.

I am not always longing for sex. My life does not revolve around it. But if the guy in my life has the desire, I am usually willing to accommodate. After all, he is a special guy to me and I want to satisfy him and make him happy.

Done right, sexual intimacy can be one of the real joys of life. And I think I do it right, despite what a few others may say. Perhaps even my mom.