Dan's Call, and Subsequent Thoughts

Dan called me yesterday somewhere right before 9PM. He casually asked how I was doing, which was a mistake because I immediately went into detail concerning my dislocated toe. I wrote about the poor toe yesterday in this blog. I told Dan that it was not a life-threatening condition.

Anyway, after he listened very patiently to my grim story, he told me he had a good time with me on Tuesday evening. He said that I made him feel very relaxed and I seemed to give him self-confidence. He then stated that he does not always feel that relaxed and confident with women because, as he said, “obviously I’m not all that good-looking”.

I immediately chuckled while babbling something like, “Well, you are certainly good-looking enough for me.” That brought a laugh to Dan, and it pretty much ended that topic of discussion.

Funny, I liked that Dan kissed me on Tuesday at the conclusion of our little stroll we took after dinner around the restaurant’s neighborhood, but now I know that it was probably difficult for him to muster the courage to do that. Given my response to the kisses, he undoubtedly discovered that he had not overstepped his bounds, at least not as far as I was concerned. If none of this makes any sense, well, it's all in one goofy blog entry or another.

Anyway, last night we talked for quite a while. We finally said goodbye sometime after 11. It was my night to wash my hair, but I decided to put it off for a day. But I might as well have washed my hair because I did not get to sleep for a while. My brain was too preoccupied thinking about what makes two people work together at the personal level, what makes them feel this delectable form of compatibility.

I came to a couple of conclusions. I think first; two people need to have a desire to want each other romantically. The doors of affection have to be opened. I guess that is only logical.  

Also, I think the two people have to find each other’s personality traits to be more than just agreeable; they have to find the personality traits endearing, if not all of them, at least most of them. I think about the first time Dan called me and how he went on for a time in a humorous manner about why he happened to call on Monday, as well as the particular time of the call. I found it a charming way to set the tone of the conversation. My feelings immediately became positive. In a sense, I was on the runway ready for the flight. But it was not just what he said, but also how he said it. He was not loud or overbearing. He was quietly relaying a silly observation that I might find amusing.

On Tuesday at dinner I felt the same thing but for different reasons. Dan would talk about his approach to life, for example, and I not only understood, but I could also empathize. But it was not just what he said, but how he said it, his voice and subtle mannerisms. He could draw me in, but then, I was opened to it.    

For a few minutes that evening I talked about how I was very homesick at the beginning of my freshman year at Cornell. I said that I felt really depressed, but then one Saturday morning I walked around in an old neighborhood off campus. There I said hello to a man mowing his lawn, and down the street a little farther I stopped at a yard sale and bought a seagull refrigerator magnet for 25 cents. I turned the corner and there was a freshly-coated blacktop driveway and its vaguely familiar aroma, and I thought; okay, it’s not exactly home, but I can survive here.

As I was finishing my story, Dan smiled and his head began to nod. He knew exactly what I was talking about. It was as though he had tapped into my very essence. I found it very exhilarated.

We are going out again Saturday evening. I have been asked to be ready to go by 6:34 PM. Yes, 6:34. It will be a modest dinner followed by ice cream, so I have been informed. On Saturday afternoon I’m going to make a point of changing my bed’s linen, and I’m going to make sure I have plenty of milk in the refrigerator, enough for breakfast for two. When a man has both the desire, and ability, to make love to my psyche, I want him to make love to the rest of me too. I’m weird that way.

A well-spent quarter